coconuts (figurehead at least - or best)

and there she was

unadorned in the sunlight

on a ship

of golden linens

the headboard mast

and the flag she flew

was a haven

that surmounted my

most lofty

desire

she was a gilded

goddess

laying there bare

on the starboard deck

safe from a

sea

of my dirty laundry

and waiting

for the shipwreck

either marooned

together

on some distant island

the two of us can

share

forever

or

the shipwreck

itself

of our love

a horrid violent

collision

of the raging storms

and the splintered mess

it can leave

in it’s wake

and i knew for sure

what she couldn’t see

that

it would be both

a shipwreck

and an island

and

a lifetime supply

of the same

old

fish

and

coconuts

3:12 am (man, it makes a mess)

i hear the fridge

or freezer

buzzing low

‘go to bed, fool, go to bed’

3:12 in the morning

and I have a buzzing head

life make so much noise

it echoes there for hours

and drips out so damned slowly

and so it lingers there and sours

and leaves a strange and sticky aftertaste

stuck to the walls of my brain

if mankind blows my mind again

these walls will all be stained

there it is

the conscience

dripping down

the wallpaper

old

and out of style

i guess…

…and man, it makes

a horrid fucking mess

death & you

death

there’s the bar-fight

i’m destined for

and at this point

i would smash body from bottle

going down

swinging

bleeding and raw

a brawler among brawlers

knuckles worn and sore

the company store

won’t dog me

down

i’ve worked for

everything

i own

so i say, ‘fuck it’

bring it on

death do you best

i’ll be standing

in the dust

settling around

that’s probably why

he hasn’t messed with me

yet

but I see the horizon

and the day

i will

present my neck

and go down

slowly

hopefully in my sleep

on a cool summer day

the breeze

blowing

my unfinished

dreams

into

the

sunlight

and my songs

and poems

fluttering around

the room

waiting

to be read

and loved

by

you

response (remember)

ani dear,

sometimes

…women

suck

too…

don’t forget

it’s the human condition

that breeds

the awfulness

that you attribute to

men

sometimes,

and here is

the long-and-short of it,

    the

women

you

  speak

    of,

there are only a few

here

just like

there are

a few men

that

are good leaders

as well

and they

are

holed up

with their pens

   and guitars

hiding from the world

this awful

place

to try

and love

and breathe

and let’s face it

if we are truly

equal

(which I fully believe

we are)

we are

equally capable

of the same

evils

that

have

plagued

humankind

forever-plus-the-length-of-pain

so

just remember

this

when you sing,

because some

people

might

be listening

some

might

also

hear

what

you

say….

….and

my voice

is

still

so

small.

nyquil & vodka (when will you come back home?)

stars

above

the neighborhood

cool night

warmer than

it should be

and I am taking

nyquil

and vodka

to get you off my mind

i have a prescription

from a old song

but it hasn’t worked yet

the dose is still wrong

and

i miss you

kid

so

much

sometimes

that I can hear

the wolves on the wind

way out in the pines

six glasses or so

and still you’re on my mind

you’re still on my mind

even after

all

this time

and that’s why

because there are stars

above the trees tonight

and your eyes are on my mind

the devil blue

that had me

and kept me all this

time

the glassy glimpse

into the soul

of someone

so fragile

inside

they haunt me

so here

I will hide

nyquil and vodka

so thanks,

girl,

for

the

ride

storm again 367 (your door)

there is

a horrible storm

brewing in my heart

like the blackest coffee

in even

the smallest parts

there is a bad mood rising

into my black eyes

that sends a shiver

up my spine

with each of your

little sighs

and tonight

i want to rush out

into the nighttime

i want to run out

through the

coldest rain

i want to explode

due to the things

that no one knows

and from the things I cannot

show

to

you

my sweetheart i

am a damned man

i would say

and it pulls me far away

from you

and my bloodshot eyes

but like the strongest raging fire

my bed is just a funeral pyre

and the sins that i’ve done there

burn through my bones

my sweetheart i

would run so far to you

tonight

if your walking cage

was still filled with

your light

but I stand on the ground

above a cold and lonely sound

and the repercussions

ring just like church bells

and the silence on the night

might be the signal of

my last fight

and another night all drunk

here at your stone

goodnight

i whisper

to her bones

as i try and

succumb

to this

once more…

lying here all drunk

outside

your

door

a teardrops response to the tide

and when we were kissing

how could we have known that we were

soaked in kerosene

right to the bone

losing the love

for being alone

and then came the embers

falling down your back

and i was staring in line

and raring to find

that you were the one that they all were

warning me of

the carnal

creature

a carnivorous cat

laying sprawled out on the

bed

on the comforter of seasons

lying

starting the turn back

to threads

in a few worn out spots

the constellations of our love

and you were tracking me

until the rising of

each day

i would be the one for you

who did not get away

i did not agree to the suicide pact

and each little part

i want them back

that you torn out and carved out

and then threw away

like the photograph picture

sits all black and gray

in the folds of my wallet

all hidden away

of you

standing there

soaked in kerosene

and holding a match above our heads

while we were kissing

and my eyes

were closed

so

tight…